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 memories of what never was
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24 May 2004 10:50 its just me, a dog, two cats, a pretty little house, and tons of books to read. am i in heaven or what? well, nearly, i guess. the only better thing would be if it were all in the middle of the allegheny national forest. but its not, its in suburban philadelphia. oh well. inexplicable headaches and more bad dreams. last night i dreamt that the brakes on my van were completely shot and i couldnt drive without running into people and crashing into stuff. and then the dog woke me up at 5:30 and i couldnt get back to sleep. so i anticpate a nap upcoming this afternoon. a couple of neat realizations in the early morning sleepiness. alex doesnt show it, but cats are very smart. and at the same time, theyre not. kaya wanted let out of my room this morning, but when i let her out, the room she wanted to get into wasnt open. so she came back in. i closed the door. she asked me to open it again, and was astonished that she didnt see what she wanted to see. eventually she settled back into my room, satisfied that i was obviously opening the wrong door into the wrong universe. i can hear the train from my bedroom window here. and i realized that hearing the train brings back a lot of the feelings i experienced living in london and traveling on the underground all the time. the feelings mostly of rampant consumerism, exaggerated by the constant advertising in the immediate urban environment. i hear the train, and i want to go shopping. weird. i dont really like that. but at least im aware of my susceptibility to advertising and suggestion. mmm, maybe a nap outside soon. |
