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Ichabod!

11 March 2005 20:39

im both proud of myself and disgusted with myself lately.

im proud of myself because of everything ive done at the school. i had my second semester evaluation on tuesday, and i got all positive feedback. i had an incredible math lesson, and the setup went perfectly smoothly. plus ive been continuing my virus removal on the schools computers and music for sunday mass. and ive recently taken on one more responsibility. next week were hosting students from texas for an alternative spring break, and im listed as their school contact person. im going to help lead their morning and evening prayers, and accompany them on their dinners in the community.

i didnt exactly volunteer for this, its more like it was kind of put upon me and i accepted. i was thinking of all the benefits, meeting new people, small group prayer and reflection, free dinners with fun people in the community.

then theres the drawbacks. theyre arriving sunday afternoon, so i should get all of my lesson planning done before then. i should also get all of my classroom prep done before then because i wont have time before school (leading morning prayer) and i wont have time in the evening (community dinners).

on top of all that ill have less time to take care of myself. and thats why im pretty disgusted with myself lately. because this week, me time has meant falling asleep on the couch. not yoga, not spending time outside in the newly found sunshine, not even cleaning up my room and taking care of my sanctuary for my own piece of mind. in fact, my entire wardrobe has been sitting on my bed all week long, and i just sleep around it. ive even been forgetting to put my bag balm on my hands at night to help the cuts on my fingers. showering is an afterthought. ive been a total slug sitting here on the couch falling asleep at my computer, and im not proud of it.

but its hard to see an end to it, since i wont have the time to take care of myself this week.

at least ill have some motivation to take care of myself tonight. everyone else has left me for the club in farmington, which means i can play my music as loud as i want so i can hear it from anywhere in this side of the convent. i should clean my room, take a nice long shower with the gingerbread man, and maybe paint my nails or something, something that will remind me through the rest of the week to remember to take care of myself.