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Ichabod!

25 November 2003 01:10

have i become too much of a physics major? too linear? too planned? too forced? too compartmentalized?

ive been hung up on a few ideas trying to put together my lotr paper. the idea ive focused on is too complex for a 4 page paper but im not sure how to break it down so ive just been trying to piece it together with strained outlines and text support. and its not working. i havent really written anything for it yet.

so i discussed it today with my english prof, and she knows that i have a lot of good ideas and questions about lotr, im just hung up and frankly, kind of intimidated at the thought of writing just a four page paper on such a huge book. so she suggested this: sit at my computer, set a time limit and a page limit, maybe four pages in an hour. and just type, just write, use the text a lot, but dont worry about thoughts or conclusions or theses. dont think about it, just write it. let it sit. come back to it. pick out the good stuff. do it all over again.

sounds familiar, cause i used to write my papers that way, freshman year. and those were some pretty damn good papers. im still really proud of my ten page paper on love in les liaisons dangereuse and madame bovary. how did i get so far away from that, and into this place where im so hung up on structuring everything before i write it that i just cant write anymore?

i even structure my arvianna entries in my head before i write them. they're all planned out, with a little outline in my head of what points i want to make.

and i think this touches on something i said to jesse too, about how i used to write pages and pages in my journal but i didnt write often, and now that i write often, i write much shorter entries. barely even a page at a time in my paper journals now. its like theres only two songs in me and i just wrote the third.((dont know where i got the inspiration or how i wrote the words.))

ah, i wish i didnt have qmech tomorrow morning. i just want to write some more. i feel like im taking senior year to be the english major i never was. including the poetry writing class ive always wanted to take. the fact that i marvel at yet dont really understand qmech doesnt help. but who really does understand qmech?