care? leave a note

Ichabod!

2002-10-07 8:51 p.m.

so exhausted. i walked across campus tonight just to drop off ten dollars and i swear it felt like i had opened my eyes for the first time in months. months! the silhouette of dillon and alumni against the starry velvet sky. really caught my eye. like it was the first time i wasnt rushing from here to there or engrossed in some huge group of people. reminded me of when i used to walk to fisher in the cold and snow for adoration early tuesday mornings. and it makes me wonder where im rushing to all these times. i know i know, im rushing to fit everything in around band, school work and friends and food and whatnot. fall break will be well deserved when it comes. all i can do now is focus on the exams i have...not get more behind than i am already. work, but not get too stressed. this is such a hard semester! what did my dad write to me today in a letter? "hope you're enjoying the challenge of "learning things"". yes, learning things was in quotation marks in his letter. he also referred to the existentialismobile as my van, not his and pretended like my study on the inefficiency of the PA bureaucracy was responsible for the Pine Grove Furnace alternative sewage treatment plant finally getting the green light.

reading siddhartha, and the section on his son has given me new things to think about with my relationship with my parents. my dad, especially. i cant find the paragraph that really stopped me in my tracks though, i was going to put it in my aim profile. maybe ill find it again sometime.

feeling good, still way better than before. gonna keep it that way, too